and then, the news: our son would die, most likely in utero. maybe within days, maybe within weeks. his chance of survival after birth was almost non-existent.
how could this have happened? did God make some huge mistake when creating our son?
no relevant information could be found in any pregnancy book i owned. so those books were put away and we turned to the scriptures for answers.
what we found was that jonathan was woven together by God exactly the way he was supposed to be and that his days were ordained long before he was conceived. (Psalm 139.)
introducing: woven together
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am
fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together
in the depths of the earth,
your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
~ Psalm 139:13-16
woven together is the name of the ministry i am working on, which aims to honor pre-born babies who are purposefully created in such a way that they receive a devastating prenatal diagnosis, as well as to encourage mothers as they bravely choose life while facing eventual loss.
each prenatally-diagnosed baby will receive a personalized, embroidered preemie baby blanket, personally "woven together" by me. the idea is not original or complex, obviously, but i think something that makes it extra special is that the name or monogram of each baby will be embroidered on the blanket. i believe every mother who is facing or has experienced a loss understands the importance the child's name being remembered, and of a lasting personalized keepsake.
for those mothers who experience an unexpected loss during or shortly after birth for any reason, my plan is to embroider the name or monogram of their babies onto a piece of fabric that can be used as a quilt square, a photo album cover, in a framed photo set or shadow box, the front of a pillow, or other keepsake project. the possibilities are endless. i've decided to make it a more "do it yourself" type of keepsake, because it allows for many keepsake ideas and possibilities, as well as the satisfaction of making something special for your child.
i am truly honored to be able to offer encouragement to those mothers who are walking the same difficult road as i am, as well as to do something for others in memory of my precious son jonathan. right now, i am prayerfully seeking the Lord's guidance on this ministry, and am expecting it to evolve somewhat as certain needs or requests come to light.
eventually i'll post more details, contact info, etc.
i would love to hear your thoughts or suggestions as well by way of a comment. :)