refreshed

I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. ~Psalm 121:1-2

wow. what a difference a couple of weeks makes! i knew there would be hills and valleys in our journey, but i am amazed how God has promptly taken us out of the valley and back up the hill again in such a short time. where in the valley of facing difficult decisions two weeks ago, there was oppression and low visibility, like walls closing in on us, this week’s hill is very much a breath of fresh air; the place where i remember what it’s like to be able to see for miles and miles. it’s a glimpse of the bigger picture again. the view reminds me that i am just one small speck in a very magnificent landscape. (or perhaps, one thread in a beautiful tapestry!) again, God is so much bigger and better than i give Him credit for. i am humbled by the fact that He is so magnificent but that He still cares for little ol’ me. "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." ~Matthew 10:29-31

even though reaching this hill in our journey doesn’t change our circumstances, it does refresh us with new strength, new grace, and the confidence to make it perhaps one more day, one more week, one more month.

thank you, again, for your blog comments, your emails, your cards, your prayers. they mean so much to us. i am very aware that i am not the only one traveling a rocky road, yet you still take the time to remember us and encourage us. i realize that you may be facing a circumstance that mirrors my own, or perhaps is much more serious. or maybe you are facing day-to-day struggles that leave you weary. wherever you may be in life, whatever sorrow may be yours right now, whether you are standing in a valley or on a hill…please know that God is with you and He loves you wholly and completely. every hair on your head matters. greg and i have never been more sure of this truth.

i do understand it is difficult to grasp this truth when you are in the midst of a trial. i rest in the great assurance that jonathan will never struggle with this. he will never know anything other than the love of his parents and love of his Creator. he will never question his significance in life, because in heaven he will know the very depth of the impact his little life made during his time on earth, whether he takes a breath or not. i think that several months from now, when i am longing to hold my sweet baby in my arms, this thought will give me peace.