This is the story of our precious baby boy, who was diagnosed prenatally at
17 weeks with a fatal chromosome disorder called Trisomy 13. Although
Jonathan's condition is considered "not compatible with life", we desired to give
him every chance at life. Our prayer is that those who are touched by our story
are drawn to God, who is Life Himself. John 14:6

To start at the beginning of our story, click here.



well, already 2010 has not started like i envisioned.

the good news is that "losing 5 pounds" will no longer be my new year's resolution. i can check that one off already.

that's right, i spent the first two days of the new year very sick. it appears a stomach virus (no doubt lingering from that mean ol' 2009) had attacked 2/3 of our family. i thought i had food poisoning until greg also got sick. we immediately had kate whisked off to the grandparents' and used an entire can of lysol in our house. that seems to have done the trick. so far kate has escaped it's wrath, thank goodness.

we apologize in advance to the friends we hung out with for several hours on new year's eve.

and i apologize to my mother, who is sick even as i type this.


i normally don't make a big deal about new year's resolutions or "starting over" every time january first rolls around. i might make a goal to read more, eat less, and water my plants more often or something boring like that.

well this year, i stood on 2010's doorstep with a ton of baggage collected over the past few months.

and i made the choice to step over the threshold and leave the baggage behind:

~minor regrets of things i should have done or didn't do while i was pregnant with jonathan or while he was alive in my arms....gone.

~getting thank-you notes out in a timely manner or not visiting jonathan's grave enough....gone.

~and the big one: letting people's negative reactions or comments about our decision to keep jonathan, or about our faith bother me....gone.

and that's just the tip of the baggage iceberg for me.

i have realized that by concerning myself with these types of things, especially the ones i can't change or put too much pressure on myself about, have caused me to become very weary. i recently found myself back at the place where my prayers were one word, "help," because i was too tired and overwhelmed to pray anything else.

in 2010, i gladly hand it over to the One who says:

"Come unto me all who are weary and heavy burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart, and you will find rest for your souls. " ~Matthew 11: 28-29

"Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall." ~Psalm 55:22

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." ~1 Peter 5:7

i pray each of you have a baggage-free 2010!


  1. Praise God for His grace to enable you to drop that baggage, Lauren, and cast your cares on Him! I pray that He will continue to lavish His grace on you in 2010 and overwhelm you with His peace (You know, the stuff that truly transcends all comprehension! ;-) ). I remember being deeply impacted when you wrote awhile back about how you felt that you could not escape His peace, even if you wanted to (again, what marvelous grace!). I pray that this year your heart will be filled with that very same thing. Thanks for encouraging us to drop our bags and find rest in our Savior...we all need to do that!


  2. You know...I have a lot of that baggage right now too. And I'm DROPPING it. Those thank-yous will get done when I am up to it, and I will let comments roll off my back. Period.

    BTW--It bothers me to no end that people made negative comments to you about keeping Jonathan. Seriously, who do people think they are?

  3. Thank you...I needed your prayers for me for a baggage free new year's....and I pray it continues for you. It was one of my NY goals!

    Much love, and many prayers....and I praise you for your faith and choices! I'd do the same thing!

  4. Right on, Lauren. May 2010 be a blessed one for you and your family.

  5. Sweet Lauren !
    I am so grateful for your heart and your willingness to share your life with so many people ! I absolutely love the way you tell us what God says to you in His word ! It is very evident that you seek our Wonderful Counselor and Mighty God and Everlasting Father and Prince of Peace in every area of your life !
    It thrills me that you are His display of His splendor when you are going through your trials and He is the One whom you run to when you need help !!! He is the One who truly cares for you and you tell of His mighty acts and the wonders He does in your life and He is glorified !
    I am getting to know your heart and it is beautiful :-)
    I am so glad to be related to you in Christ and I am learning so much from you Lauren !
    Let us magnify the Lord together this year and exalt His Name together sweet child of the Most High God our Abba Father <><

  6. I think this is the best New Year's resolution ever and lesson I could learn myself!

  7. Wonderful words, Lauren. May we each have a baggage free 2010~so glad the Lord is helping you release those things that could weigh you down so easily.

    My prayer for you lately is that you would find comfort, peace, and joy in your day to day tasks, in the mundane and the wonderful, and that God would give you eyes to see the wonderful amidst the mundane. I have also found myself praying that you would have peace and joy without pressure even to be blogging (I know what a therapeutic release it can be to blog, but I also know the kind of pressure I put on myself then to "keep the blog updated" and make it sound eloquent every time.) Your blog is a source of inspiration to me (and many others!) but I pray you are finding your satisfaction and identity in God alone.

    SO excited to see more of you during the week at Bible study! Yay!